What’s a Seventh-inning Stretch Without Peanuts and Cracker Jack?

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TC Chong, on a burglar using a doggy door to break into a house: “The police report stated that jewelry, cash, three cans of Alpo and a box of Milk Bones were missing.”

  • Janice Hough, on the Ravens trading Joe Flacco to Broncos: “Well, Denver has already proven you can win a Super Bowl with a former NFL quarterback.”
  • With Reilly, Mitchell and Harris off the table, and Jennings negotiating with Ottawa, can you imagine where the Riders would have been had they not signed Zach Collaros? If you want to see who is on the Riders roster, visit www.riderville.com/roster/. It looks pretty good.
  • Did the Montreal Alouettes know they could sign free agents on and after Feb. 12? Is it time to worry about the future of the CFL in Montreal? 
  • Minutes after Auston Matthews scored his 100th goal last week, Sportsnet released a recording of all of them. I wonder what they will do for his 1,000th.
  • It is touching every time a player such as Mitch Marner acknowledges a young fan. Those pucks and sticks and smiles are precious.
  • From Torben Rolfsen: “Pitchers and catchers have reported to their agents’ offices to find out why they don’t have contracts.”
  • Chong, on INRIX Global Ranking rating Boston as the worst American city for traffic: “No wonder, there seems to be a parade, marathon or some other sideshow every month.”
  • Hough, on the Cleveland Browns signing Kareem Hunt: “Well, Baker Mayfield had a least a few months of being part of a feel-good story.”
  • Has the CFL had a tryout camp in Liechtenstein? 
  • From Rolfsen: “Why wouldn’t Kyler Murray choose football? There’s a new league starting every week.”
  • Here’s a question for you: Are Bill Belichick and Tom Brady the most disliked coach/player combo in sports ever? Who else is in the running? While I am not a hater, I suspect the two are right up there. Winning does that.
  • Chong, on Dunkin Donuts Park in Hartford banning peanuts and Cracker Jack from its baseball stadium out of concern for allergies: “So the seventh-inning stretch will call for revised lyrics: “Buy me some donuts and cinnamon buns.’”
  • Tim Tebow, six-feet-three and 245 pounds; Pat Mahomes, six-feet-three and 230 pounds; Donald Trump, six-feet-three and 243 pounds. Someone is fibbing.
  • Hough, on Duke coming back from 23 points down in the second-half to beat Louisville 71-69: “Are we sure the Blue Devils weren’t playing the Atlanta Falcons?”
  • From comedy writer Alex Kaseberg: “Kenny-G was hired by Kanye West to play for Kim Kardasian on Valentine’s Day amid hundreds of long-stemmed roses. This is exactly why other countries despise us.”
  • Rolfsen, on the New York Knicks using an image of Kevin Durant in their 2019-20 season-ticket pitch to fans: “Seems a little premature, but better than the last few years when they featured Pizza Rat.”
  • From Toronto Star columnist Bruce Arthur: “Marc Gasol got a bigger ovation at the Raptors game than Sting did, despite having 17 fewer Grammys.”
  • Chong, on a Wire Fox Terrier winning Best in Show at the annual Westminster Dog Show: “It was not a popular win as there were scattered boos in the crowd. When I heard that, I thought the dog might have been named Bettman or Goodell.”
  • Shouldn’t we be calling Sid the Kid, Sid the Adolescent by now?
  • A question from Rolfsen: “Is Matt Kuchar advising MLB teams on spending money this offseason?”